My Pain

I used to make decisions for you. Even when you didn’t need me to. As always,I was convinced I was doing what was best.I kept secrets because I wanted to protect you from their evil. I defended you in front of others without realizing I made you seem helpless.

I thought I treated you as my equal but deep down I was protecting you like a child. I worried too much about you. My life wasn’t interesting without you. Your mood always affected mine and of course this birthed a lot of bickering. Needless fights that left us both exhausted. I blamed myself for all the insults hurled at you. Your smile lifted me out of my worst moods. Your eyes gave me a glimpse of sincerity.

We went through a lot together but we survived with lessons for scars. An enviable bond we formed. We sorted out our differences as soon as we could. Our unique likeness defied the laws of physics. Each day,I see more of me in you. I can’t be happy if you are not.Things always come up to set us apart but we wind around them.

One day, I decided not to be protective for I realized I did not own you. I only had a duty, to help you be the best in every facet of your life. It always hurt to see you sad but lying to you to make you happy is not an option. I saw also that my overbearing presence was caging you.I set out to be more open than ever. I wish you could see that all I do to you is for you. It was hard to tell you the truth but being frank helps a lot. Sometimes we hurt the people we love to make them better people. It hurt me to do that but it was necessary. I try not to think that the look I saw on your face was a reflection of what was in your heart because when I say “I’m in”, I mean it.

This unedited piece is straight from me to you.

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